"in soviet russia, cartoon draws you!"

"In Soviet Russia, Ketchup Straws Vibrate You!"

Ladies and Gentlejerks...i would like you to meet a very good friend of mine, Vladimir Stalin Sputnik.

purhcased at Saint Vincents Thrift Store for $1, he is the Russianiest Russian i know.
Of course, i don't know any russians...but still! Handmade with High Quality Felt©
and Other Shit©, he has become our proud Mascot. Accompanying us on various Excursions...

(though he is a bit of a lush, so he never gets to be the Designated Driver)
and helping us decide which item on the Perkins Menu is the least toxic...

you, gentle reader, can now look forward to a weekly update on the ADVENTURES OF VLADIMIR STALIN SPUTNIK!!!
you are thrilled, i can tell...

how could you not be? he is such a ladies man! Women want him and men want to be him!
now i leave you, gentle reader, to wait with baited breath for the next action packed installment of the ADVENTURES OF VLADIMIR STALIN SPUTNIK!!!


also, if the title to this post confused you,Educate yourselves.

awesomenessativity

KNOTTY KNITTERS

now accepting applications for new members, bitches.




look how badass we are! ^_^

Baby Lou tattoo

Full thrust on the machine, pins on to my skin
I'm getting my soul reapplied
While my skin is getting dyed

angst angst angst, rant rant blah.
i want to hop on a bus and just go...SOMEWHERE for a week. not tell anyone.
then stealthily come back and act like i never left. that would be good times all around.

i am a fiend.

a vectoring, Knitting FIEND!





also...pigtail pirates would totally beat hair ninjas any day of the week!

Kalimba band

The Geriatric Penii
Yarn Pubes
Scare the Pizza outta you




Constipation killed the dinosaurs...

stockings and such

imagine, (if you will) two friends. BEST friends, in fact. have been for more than 15 years. (they've always joked that they should date eachother some day)

now imagine that one of them, Friend A, confesses to the other, Friend B, that A has had feelings for B for a long time. B never gives A a clear response for or against this possibility, but seems to feel better about themself knowing that A loves B.

now imagine that less than a week later, B sleeps with one of A's friends. is it safe to say that A has A's answer?

i am classy

and emily takes cool photos.

Missing Pieces.

Lately i've been feeling a bit like an Unfinished Puzzle...you know...when you've almost completed it except for this big hole right in the middle? but you aren't too worried, because you still have a bunch of pieces sitting out on the table...but when you try them one by one...None Of The Pieces Fit.

That's me. i'm just a puzzle with a big hole where my heart should be...just waiting for someone to come along and fill it for me...and i have a lot to give! i'm not just any boring old 200 piecer...i'm like one of those 3-D puzzles you can get of "Big Ben," or the Eiffel Tower, or whatever...where did i get this metaphor from? I don't even like puzzles!

Vectoria

i love doing these vectors. there is something soothing to me about them.
when you are zoomed in so closely on a picture that you can see all the little details on the eyes and lips it is just a beautiful thing to me...it helps me learn a lot about form and shading. there is just something satsifying about creating a picture that turns out like this one did. Thanks for modeling for me, Emily!

Burn, baby, burn

one more because Amanda Palmer is hot...


there needs to be a show like CSI miami...only without all the filler...just shots of people staring at the sun and thoughtfully putting their hands on their hips while donning a pair of godawful sunglasses. lots of different people. it wouldn't need a plot...
just lots of "woosh" noise sound effects between shots...and polarized looking effects on every other frame...and bizarre color balance.

it would be amazing.

anyone have a video camera and some glasses i can borrow?

You can tell

from the red in my eyes and the bruises on my thighs and the knots in
my hair and the fact i'm full of lies


i think this is going to end up being an art blog...
my friend, Emily (whose blog is awesome) talked me into starting one of these...
i was actually quite excited til i remembered i am by no means a writer.
usually if i try to write eloquent or meaningful things it ends up reading like a teen girl's secret diary. Shallow and boring. so i will use this to post arts and such and maintain my mysterious thoughtful persona.
*strikes a pose*
also, have a page i scanned and colored from our coloring book adventure that she talked about...i plan on using the lines and my handy-dandy copy of photoshop to create some kind of magnificent online digital coloring book! now i just need to find a host for the PDFs...